I Can See...Almost!

It's been over two weeks since I had PRK (Photorefractive Keratectomy) and the recovery and healing have been slow. I have learned much about the anatomy of the eye and more about myself since this surgery. In short, the cells in my cornea has not reproduced as fast as needed and the outer tissue called the epithelium that was removed has completely replaced itself. My eye doctor has continued to monitor my eyes, change my eye drops, and even join his wife in praying for me and my healing. As this coming week unfolds, we are hoping that the steriod eye drops that I am on will speed up the recovery process allowing for better sight.

There's no denying that the past two weeks have been trying and frustrating at times. When I have had to drive, I am not that confident in my vision and have prayed literally every time I start up the van! I can't recognize faces far away and feel as if people think I am paying them no attention. I cannot read my Bible or any other book for that matter and find myself going to bed early.

I am comfortable seeing around the house as it is familiar and have managed home well, I think. But for a type A personality, it has come with failure and frustrations. It hurts to look at the computer screen which means I cannot play games online with my boys, put my dates into my computer calendar, check email, blog, etc. I have mixed up my children's clothing and almost left out a cup of flour in my homemade chocolate chip banana bread.

Ben has used his past two Fridays off to run errands with me and for me. He has come home to give us rides and has helped so much around the house.

At first, and at times, they still are, frustrations. I already knew I wasn't patient. I already knew I liked being in control. I have not checked email in two weeks, creating an inbox with over 200 messages. Do you know what that does to a control freak? i have sat still and meditated on verses I know by heart. Do you know what that does to a busy body? I have had to delegate and set aside tasks for the future. Do you know what that does to a to-do list fanatic?

This time of waiting has taught this Type A to-do list busy body control freak that my life is less restricted and more peaceful when I am not in charge. I have rested and really have enjoyed not being on the computer a few hours a day. I know that I would rather spend time checking email and reading blogs than building train tracks and playing band with my boys.

I trust that the Maker of my eyes has been the One that has brought Peace in the midst of blur and frustration. And though I want my eyesight to be perfect right this very minute, I will wait and rest.