saturday is for waiting

me and the boys curl up once again on the sofa to watch our church's night of prayer with live stream.

how miraculous is that! to connect with our faith community who is meeting just a few miles in the heart of our city.

but because of bedtime and a school night, we curl up on the sofa rather than a sanctuary seat.

i see and hear my pastor husband say, "saturday is for waiting."

good friday depicts death and crucifixion.

Easter Sunday brings life and resurrection.

but saturday is for waiting.

for Christ followers today, we know that Sunday is coming!

and we will celebrate His life and the hope of His resurrection as we gather all over the world!

but for Christ followers who literally witnessed the death and crucifixion of Jesus,

that saturday was bleak.

that saturday was a day of mourning.

their world was shattered.

their faith was probably questioned.

they tried to make sense of His teachings and miracles and time on earth.

they were afraid. some ran and hid. others denied ever knowing this Man.

saturday was sabbath.

"on the Sabbath they rested according to the commandment." {Luke 23.56}

 and i stumble through the Gospels, wanting desperately for Matthew, Mark, Luke and John to tell me how to wait.

how to wait between death and life.

how to keep a head up when the day is bleak.

when my world is shattered.

when my faith is being questioned.

when i want to make sense of this adoption process.

when i'm afraid and sometimes run and hide.

but it's Matthew that tells me who was active on saturday.

the disciples and the women were quiet and resting and waiting.

all the Gospels are quiet about saturday.

it was the enemy moving about frantically.

it was the enemy positioning guards. getting an extra seal on the tomb.

it was the enemy trembling about what tomorrow would bring.

i want to believe that Jesus' followers experienced saturday differently one from the other.

i find myself waiting. you find yourself waiting too. our saturdays probably look different from each other.

waiting for life to come from death.

waiting for healing. for restoration. for reconciliation. for movement. for an opportunity.

i'm waiting for an overturn and to be back in the process of pursuing our daughter.

our agency was able to speak to someone at the ind*a office and asked about our case this week.

our contact was making sure they were reviewing our appeal.

"please send the appeal letters again," was their reply.

"what?" was my reply in my heart.

"it was sent to you months ago? have you deleted the email and attachments?"

"what's been happening all this time while we've been begging God to act?"

i want to echo my Savior's words, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"

please, God, we're ready for Sunday. we're longing for Easter.

the wait is hard and long.

the death feels heavy on our hearts.

i want to believe that many of them gathered together to wait.

to wonder what God was up to in the heavenlies.

i, too, am surrounded by other waiters.

as we wait together,

let's remember that Sunday is coming.

God is up to something in the heavenlies.

and when that stone is rolled away,

and we see the nail-pierced hands,

the death and waiting will make more sense.

we will tell our story of death and waiting, but won't stop there.

saturday is for waiting, but Sunday is coming!

and that's worth talking about.