this crazy life

in this crazy life on my dead end street, we are not entitled to just our driveway spaces to hold our four wheels. instead we can parallel and perpendicular park and must avoid parking on said streets on street cleaning days. parking brakes are a must and become habit forming after at least one mistake. wheels must be turned a certain way upon parking and for the life of me, that's one fact i can't keep straight in my head. that's why you see me stepping outside the car and seeing how everyone else's wheels are turned. yes, i'm that pathetic when it comes to parking.

fortunately for now, our van can be parked on the street throughout the nighttime at no cost to the family. fortunately. but when san francisco is awake, the meters rise and shine too. for they have a job to do and are the highest paid. we feed them well and when we try to starve them, they show us who's boss. then we starve.

i find it comforting that a large part of san francisco is open roads for most of the day. {highways are not a part of this conversation} and my GPS tells me that there are a multitude of ways of getting from point a to point b. i allow myself thirty minutes to get anywhere. it's always a win if i make it there on time. i have been known to give out high fives for such a success. for me, it does require complete silence from others in the vehicle and classical music on pandora. i must drive calm. i must drive calm. for one road can be flat and the next a 60% upgrade. one road can be a two-way street, but with cars parked parallel on both sides, the street is only fit for pedestrians and cyclists. go figure.

i have the convenience of carline in the morning at school. easy out. keep moving. yet, at the end of school, it's a race for parents who pick up to score a parallel parking spot within a few blocks of the campus. i have been known to score one at the start of the day a.k.a. 7:45 and just walk to my daily tasks so as to have won that spot. it's that competitive.

school is only 6 hour days so by the time i drop off, i pick up. unless i score that free parking spot and then i've got a few extra minutes. it feels like a half-day and for that i think we have earned the right to say we do public school and home school. for real. they are home at 1:50 pm. we fill the afternoon with lego play, cooking in the kitchen, learning hindi, screen time, reading, playdates, multiplication flashcards, library visits, ninja/warrior outside time and the "let's guess what time daddy will walk in the door" game.

sometimes i'm the crazy in this crazy life.

 i let circumstances and stress mount and take over and rule. i give situations the power to control my attitude and how i face the day. that's not the crazy i want. because this kinda crazy messes with the truth that i know and warps it into false hope and negativity and debbie-downer moments.

i can thrive in this crazy life when i know that...

this crazy life is full of limits.

parking meter limits and

closed streets and

space too tight for our minivan and

rental limits. yes, but

knowledge that i do have limits. and that's a good thing.

limits on me because i wasn't intended to do it all on my own.

limits that make me more aware that it's God who is in control.

this crazy life is full of trust.

i can't impact or influence on my own.

i'm choosing to live not my way, but His.

areas of my life are clearly out of my control and i must trust.

i can't make it happen, but i can trust in the One Who can.

this crazy life is full of only God moments.

full of faith leaps.

full of risk taking.

i absolutely think it's crazy to live in a way that demands God's intervention and presence. it's risky to live in a way that needs Him to show up and move and act or else. it's crazy to pray for parking spots and pedestrians and a denial to be overturned.

"because as long as i can handle it, i will never reach out to God," says my pastor husband.

so i'll take this crazy life. i'd have it no other way.

and if you're the pedestrian at the crosswalk, you just got prayed over.

living this crazy life? post a picture on instagram with
 hashtag #thiscrazylife. 
a life full of limits. 
a life full of trust. 
a life full of only God moments.