3 Ways to Go Deeper and Wider in the Conversation on Race
I’m sharing this space with some of my friends over the next few weeks. Friends I’m learning from. Friends I want you to meet.
Help me honor and welcome Rosie Villodas. She lives in Queens, New York with her husband and two kids, where they pastor New Life Fellowship. Rosie and Rich are dear friends of our family and Epic Church. I’ve been especially learning from the Villodas as they lead their family and church in conversations and actions towards racial healing and reconciliation. Many of you sent me notes about the previous post and want to learn. Listen up. Lean in. Link arms. Look through the lens of Christ.
Here’s Rosie:
How can we begin to go deeper and wider when it comes to racism and racial injustice in our country? We must first understand that this is a long and slow work. Going deep and wide in this area will not be a 4-step process; it will not be a list of things to check off. Instead, this will be a beautiful and hard time of standing before the Lord as you are and allowing him to heal areas in your life you never knew you needed to give to him before. This is good work. This is holy work. This is a work that will transform us to be more like Jesus and see his kingdom come to earth, as it is in heaven.
Secondly, going deeper will mean we will have to slow down and take an honest look at how our individual family of origin stories have shaped how we relate to one another. Take the time to think, process and write down answers to the questions below. Doing so will help us to name, and then deconstruct untrue and unhelpful thought patterns. Answering these questions may lead to feeling a sense of embarrassment or shame. As hard as it may be, fight every urge to run away from that discomfort. Instead, allow the discomfort to turn you towards the Lord (and others) in confession and repentance. Repentance is turning away from that which is pulling you away from the things of God and turning towards the heart of God.
My husband and I use the following question when trying to help people understand racism in their context. Consider this as you do this slow and important work of going deeper:
Growing up, how did my family talk about these groups of people? What messages (spoken or unspoken) did I receive about these groups of people?
• Black people
• White people
• Asian people (East Asian, South Asian, Asian Americans)
• Latino/a/Hispanic people
• Native American people
• Middle Eastern people
Finally, while we continue to go deeper and learn more about ourselves in this area, it’s important to go wider to listen and learn from those we may not learn from often. While it is important to talk to our Black and Brown friends that go to our church or that go on the same jogging path as us, it is crucial to listen and learn from others as well. Going wider means discovering the voices that have been wrestling with this issue for some time and learning from them first. There are voices that have been teaching and writing and podcasting about race issues for years. These voices are a wellspring of information, insight and wisdom. Be intentional to seek out these voices, listen & learn from them, subscribe to their emails, buy their books, listen to their talks and podcasts. In doing this you widen your own perspective as you seek the heart of God.
You are made in the imago dei, the image of God, and so are others who look nothing like us and live different lives than we do. With our hearts turned towards the heart of God, God will turn our hearts towards each other. Let’s not be afraid of the discomfort and pain, instead let it be the beginning of healing us and our nation. Going deeper and wider is hard work; it’s uncomfortable; it’s holy work; it’s transformative work; it is the work of discipleship and it is good.
Wow! Thanks Rosie. What stood out to you? Revisiting family of origin is so crucial. I’ve been having conversations and hearing stories from my parents over the past month who have told me stories of their parents and grandparents. These stories help me understand the narratives I’ve been taught and have lived. I know from the silence, unsubscribes and unfollows that this work is hard and painful and uncomfortable, but I can’t lead us to love where we live if we can’t love and see and build relationships with people of color.
I know you’ll want to reread this post with pen and paper nearby. She gives us work to do. Healing Christ-centered work that leads to change. And make sure you click here so you can subscribe and support her writings! That’s who we are as a community: we cheer on each other!
Stay connected here as I continue to ask questions in coming posts with more friends:
Is your purpose getting rebuilt?
Do you have friends who aren’t like you?
Who are you learning from?
Do you call yourself a neighbor?
Do you really want revival?
Are you proud to be an American?
What do I do with the loss?
What do I do now?