Shauna Pilgreen

View Original

my uncool story

I had a very plain coming to Jesus. My mom and dad made the Christian journey look attractive. Jesus was knocking on my heart at a young age and I opened the door and let Him in and I can’t remember life before it was me and Him. My convictions kept me out of the popular cliques and my compassion kept me longing for my classmates to want to follow Jesus. I was already uncool and this made things harder in my head and in my friendships. I was an unidentified Enneagram One pastor’s kid in a small town. That right there is all the uncool you need to know, but I’ll tell you more.

If I wasn’t already wearing hand-me-downs in elementary school, I was certain God would take me to faraway places to tell others about Him. (In church language it would go like this: I felt a personal call to give my life to missionary service.) Even in my small southern Bible belt town, being a missionary was not something you talked about at the school lunchroom table. 

I remember spending the night at Allison Reece’s house and telling her I wanted to be a missionary one day out of Camilla, Georgia. It’s as if I voiced I’m a rare breed while at the same time feeling so free to say it out loud. (Thank you Allison for being the first person to hear this and for being a good listener.) In keeping with the fashion of hand-me-downs, I think I was wearing her 1996 Atlanta Olympics sweatshirt, but my own extra large pink glasses. 

In college, I was overjoyed to be surrounded by other Christians several states away from home. Yet another isolating incident happened on the bleachers of campus church one Sunday night. It’s as if Jesus were listening to the announcements sitting right beside me about an upcoming mission trip to Asia. I had a flashback to Allison’s bedroom. I would go to several Asian countries in college all for Jesus to show me what He was up to among other people groups and cultures. 

Of all the seats in the church house in Kampala, I found the spot on the floor by Christine the most humbling place I’ve ever sat.

In my 20s, I served kids, youth and college students in the local church. Ben and I would marry and lead mission trips. Be on mission! was our adventure even as we grew our family. I remember sitting at a Passion Conference and hearing Matt Redman sing:

We will shine like stars in the universe

Holding out Your truth in the darkest place

We’ll be living for Your glory

Jesus, we’ll be living for Your glory. 

I went home and painted this song on canvas that still hangs in our boy’s bedroom and I continue to pray this verse over them.

No greater joy in all my life than seeing my children give their lives to Christ.

In my 30s, we moved to the global city of San Francisco. God didn’t send me to one place with one culture. Languages, festivals, holidays, and a variety of world views let me know the nations were here. Not what I pictured in the 4th grade, but that plain coming to Jesus has been anything but plain!

In my 40s, I love where I live and I love telling my story. God helps me find what we have in common so we can connect and I can make much of His Son, Jesus.  If it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, don’t picture me with a megaphone. Picture me in on a walk on my street and checking in on my neighbor or in line at Trader Joe’s and starting a common chat about the pandemic. But if we’re still talking a few minutes in, you’ll likely hear about my Hope and Peace.

You need to know the uncool part of my story because maybe you’re like me and you don’t think you're cool or you feel strange because you love Jesus and not many around you love Him like you do.

It’s in the plain stories with a heart beating YES that He takes you to places and people with a boldness you couldn’t have imagined on your own.

I’m still telling God I’ll go wherever and to whomever, but I am content with the lifetime work here in the city of St. Francis of Assisi.

And as for being uncool, I’m embracing it. For me personally to try and act cool, I’d actually look more like a fool, (note: hover board accident in December!) so I’m content staying uncool because it’s me and makes my story Thine!

What was just not experienced in my childhood and in all of my dad’s life was danced off the floor in my late 30s.

And I’ve come to accept that God has given me the gift of evangelism that comes with a timer as I can’t help but believe Jesus is coming soon and I want everyone to experience His love and forgiveness. But even if that’s not your gift and you follow Jesus, you want this for others. That’s what can make us feel uncool - we’ve found invisible treasure that can only be received by faith and we can’t help but tell others. What’s your story? Try telling it here in the comments.

I’m telling my story as a part of the teaching series at Epic Church. You can watch here.